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Burger King: Going Large On A CVA Or Pre-Pack

Posted on Sep 29, 2020. by NTI

APOLOGIES FOR THE LACK OF PHOTOS TO ACCOMPANY NTI’s BULLETINS TODAY - TRACEE SPENT THE CASH TO PAY THE PHOTO-STREAMER’S INVOICE ON SOME ORANGE EYELINER

Neil’s journey back from lecturing JIEB to the terrific Manchester group didn’t go exactly as planned this evening (Tuesday 29 September). He returned to the Domestic Terminal of Stockport Airport to be told his return flight to Hampshire had been cancelled for ‘technical reasons’. Technically, Eastern Airways couldn’t be bothered to put on a plane for three knackered passengers. 

A very nice woman who introduced herself as ‘Dolce’ went the extra mile (which, regrettably, still left Neil with 234 to cover) and arranged a taxi back to Southampton Airport where he had parked his Fiat Punto at 5.30am. Half way back the driver, whose only English was ‘Covid’ and ‘Toilet’, used both of these words in an otherwise impenetrable sentence and they stopped at some motorway services in the Midlands, the driver pointing simultaneously to his face and his crotch as if to emphasise his intent. Once inside Neil approached the Burger King outlet, in fascination to see what poor people ate in such God-deprived places, nibbling on his quail and blueberry sandwich from Waitrose, when he overheard some breaking news. 

Jeff, the ‘manager’ of the outlet (aged 13) told his co-worker ‘J’ that Alix partners are heading north to review options for one of Burger King’s subsidiary companies, which directly owns approximately 25 of the chain's outlets. Neil edged closer, eager to hear more and accidentally leant on someone’s Chicken Royale Bacon and Cheese. It was the size of a large sofa cushion, but still (apparently) needed to be accompanied by six chilli cheese bites and a sharer box.

He further heard that the Burger King have eyes on a pre-pack sale or a CVA (more likely the former). The restructuring could entail the permanent closure of up to 10 of its restaurants with a number of potential job losses ... and then ‘J’ had to go and mop something up in the gents and the conversation abruptly ended.

You will read about this in your chosen place to receive second-hands news on Wednesday morning, about six hours before Neil is due to return home.

The NTI newsroom will fill in the gaps later.

 

 

 

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