HMRC Battles With Itself for the Weekend Headlines: Its Nasty and Nice Side

Posted on Feb 11, 2022. by NTI

HMRC is battling itself at the top of the headlines this Friday evening (11 February). Whatever they had done this week (and you are about to find out) they did not stand a chance of winning the 'Nastiest, Most Evil Semi-Life On the Planet' award. As Adele claimed all the other gongs at the Brits, she left the 'Nastiest ...' one to the loathsome Kurt Zouma of West Ham United, who saw fit to be filmed by his brother drop-kicking a cat this week.

West Ham didn't have the balls to drop or sack him, but it is Zouma's balls that should be drop-kicked into a blender. If any West Ham fans are reading this, please go away. If you ever applaud or cheer this baseborn imbecile again you are banned from ever reading another one of our words.

Anyhoo ...

... HMRC; Sanjeev's Gupta's companies owes it more than £26 million and despite the Revenue's prostestations that ..."“We are in continuous dialogue with all our creditors, including HMRC, to find an amicable solution that’s in the best interest of all stakeholders ..." they still saw fit this morning to issue petitions to put four of Gupta's companies into Compulsory Liquidation.

One of the motivations for that action could be because one of those companies, Speciality Steel UK, which owes £19.8 million, offered last week to pay £500 per month until July when it would know the outcome of a restructuring. We have worked out that, at that monthly rate, it would take them 3,333 years to repay the entire debt (without additional interest); the exact time it would take the globe's two greatest neuro-surgeons to locate Kurt Zouma's brain.

Liberty Steel said it was “committed to repaying all our creditors and continue to work with all stakeholders around the UK to create a sustainable future for our businesses following the collapse of Greensill Capital”. Well, not that committed, hey guys?

We are looking forward to reporting those winders on NTI's CPD TAP update service.

Staying with HMRC, the House of Commons public accounts committee today criticised them for being "soft on fraud". It said the Revenue had an “unambitious” plan to recover an estimated £5.8 billion incorrectly paid out through three business support schemes it administered over the pan ... blah, blah, blah.

HMRC came back and said that while it would try to recover all the lost money it was focusing on the most egregious examples of fraud and error ... and please could we keep the noise down as it has a headache, as it isn't used to working after 3.00pm. The head of the committee, Meg Hillier, reported their concerns with “HMRC’s fulfilment of its most basic remit of collecting tax owed”. This is a little unfair and not entirely true, as they have just forced Tracee to pay back £14.68 she claimed on entertaining in Nandos last year after a 9 month investigation.

We asked Kurt Zouma to comment, but he was too busy touching arses with his brother in a confused attempt to avoid getting Covid.

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