If you get a knock on the side door of the office and a self-employed person (we are thinking more plumber, nail technician or architect, than Gary Barlow - for tax reasons) carrying a noose is on your threshold, asking if you have a convenient jib they can attach to, pass them a leaflet rather than a stepladder, as the second stage of the Government scheme to support incomes of self-employed people through the Coronavirus crisis opens for applications today (Monday 17 August).